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but is it better than clueless?

But Is It Better Than Clueless is a movie review column in which I ask that age old question: But is it better than Clueless? Many movies attempt to reach that level but few are able to exceed that level or higher. It’s almost like, that’s a movie? According to who?

woodsclueless

Into the Woods is the movie adaptation of the classic Stephen Sondheim musical, Into the Woods. With Anna Kendrick, Chris Pine, Meryl Streep, Emily Blunt, and some other people, the cast alone is enough for some people to lose their fucking minds about it.

Let’s face it, Meryl Streep is no Brittany Murphy, but she makes do with what she has. As the only woman in Hollywood over 30 that’s not Betty White, she was a natural choice for the Witch. She does a fair job, her acting range is demonstrated, but I always felt like something was missing. Her voice didn’t quite have the same fullness that Brittany Murphy’s has, but again, Murphy demonstrated nothing short of legendary, so some of that was to be expected.

As far as story goes, well there was much to be expected. I feel like there is a kind of standard for movies now, and that standard (in my opinion) requires there to be a certain amount of scenes that take place in a mall. This movie had none of that! Nothing, not even a montage in which the characters appeared in different outfits! Needless to say, that was quite disappointing.

But it did have a good heart, you know, and I understand that it must have been difficult to deviate from the original story that Sondheim had created, so I supposed I can understand that to a degree. Morals were intact, I guess, but what was with all that singing? Compared to the musical number in Clueless, which features the Mighty Mighty Bosstones, these left much to be desired. Were there even any gays in this movie? It’s hard to say. But I think it’s because of that this movie lacked a certain sense of fun.

All things considered, I do think that the filmmakers did you know carpay diem and did the best they could with what was given. I mean, Cinderella wasn’t even blonde, so that’s pretty embarrassing right from the start.

If I had to rank this movie, I guess I’d say it’s a total Monet. Into the Woods sounds like it’s going to be a fun, gay romp through a crowded Nordstrom, but up close it was just a long mess without a single cellphone in the whole thing. See it if you’re a miserable person who loves singing and giants and look nothing like Paul Rudd.

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